Unmistakable female orgasm noises coming from upstairs shower
She must've brought a toy -- seriously doubt that he's up to the task
She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
shut up. I wear heels bigger than your dick
come over i need a lifeguard for my shower
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
I really need to get laid. I'm telling at least 10 girls that I love them tonight.
Odds are at least 1 out of those 10 girls will be as crazy as you and will be into it.
How does me getting a new dildo make you crave olive garden
Sober now. I'm really glad I didn't try to make out with that guy who has a pregnant fiance
Rick two cubicles down puked and that triggered three others puking into their trash cans as well. The janitorial staff hates it when we go drinking on a work night.
So I walked in on her and she had taped her fingers together and was crying and was whispering something about "how humbling it is being in constant glove mode"
My arrest report says I was found in midtown "performing lewd and lascivious acts on top of art meant for public display and enjoyment".
I'm just mad because I can't play gta5 all day tomorrow cuz I'll be in court testifying against a craigslist prostitute...
Also my face is like def lowkey made of silly putty
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
He stole my heart. I stole his identity.
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