I can't find my pants or my car
I didn't even hookup I think I took them off at taco bell...
ha omg I always lose my dignity at taco bell as well... so no big deal.
Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
How many 'remember name' entries is it inappropriate to have in one's cell phone?
I'll call you tomorrow. I'm ok and back i love you goodnight.
I stole a bike. Here's a pic
Do you have any idea how hard it is to hit on your nurse while getting an HIV test.
I'm not surprised. You have the libido of an Italian soccer team.
I just need three more girls to complete my 'Freak-a-leak' bang list. Know any girls named Zahra, Shavon, or Daronda?
THERE IS SOMEONE IN MY CAR MILKING HERSELF AND TELLING ME TO TRY IT
Denis dont give a fuck, Denis drinks out of straws. Denis disregards the fire station & bought 18 fire hoses so he can fight it himself if the farmhouse is on fire.
I did cocaine off my boobs last night. Then I wrote two essays and went on a run. Go me
Like did I tell you about the ex Amish guy? Because that was a mess
Pillow talk?
can't do it. no eye contact either.
Where have you been all my life
she's my really slutty friend i bring around so i can act slutty and not feel as bad about it
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
All I want right now is a waffle and some fried chicken and a penis.
Randomize
