everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
You tired to make Beefaroni in the Mr. Coffee machine.
I just had one of those moments where i was really sad that i'll never get to be asian.
I fucked him in the bathroom at Cedar Point. if it hadn't been for me already combining my two favorite things in the world the whole bathroom thing would have been a little disgusting.
I can't wait to be a mother. My daughters gonna outdrink every boy in her grade
We had to leave the bar because you were trying to show the bartender your boobs for water.
I was all over the place but at every locale you would pop out of nowhere and hand me a huge drink and say "HAMMERED"
I am the fairy godmother of the drink.
Whore are you.
Is that a Yoda insult or are you asking me where I am?
Yes.
i have my bailey's and coffee which lasts me until lunch, at which time its appropriate for me to bring a vodka and OJ mix for the afternoon. This university thing is grrreat
Vodka and Jamison is not a mixed drink
Is there something wrong with us? Seriously.
Possibly, but I'd rather not fix it.
His mom came while we were asleep naked and started asking me about my plans after high school... Is that even a thing.
Come cuddle! I'll be passed out somewhere in the library. It'll be like a scavenger hunt!
She's dancing around licking a fork of nutella. She is not sober.
Guy just rode past on a lowrider bike smoking a blunt, I want his life
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