it was the worst sex ever in the history of sex. i mean ever. and he thought he was great. actually told me he was the best id ever had...what was i supposed to say? lol...i've had better times by myself. seriously.
69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
who do I fuck, the girl waiting for me upstairs or her roomate making me mac and cheese right now?? This is the single hardest decision I've always wanted to have to make
I have shoes on. No pants. And my jacket pockets are full of ketchup and grass. Yes. Good night.
I'm having post traumatic stress flashbacks of last night. That big. Don't know whether to call him again or change my name...
he met me at the airport with a welcome home sign with a grilled cheese, PBR and a blow job on it. i missed america.
Am I the only one creeped out by the guy asleep behind our couch?
There are eight sets of guys I've made out with who have the same name. It's like noah's ark in my mouth.
Sorry, all I could picture was you jamming your dick into a lemon.
The novelty of Nekkid Straight Roommate has faded.
he's the second guy to suck on my nipple in front of my friends that i haven't made out with.
No one needs to know about the barren wasteland that is my vag. Sometimes i visualize my cervix rocking back and forth wondering where everybody went.
I just pictured that. It's reading a book.
FYI - Don’t go in the downstairs bathroom. Ryan is passed out naked on the floor with a raging hard on.
Thanks for going with me today. It’s been a long time since I bought bra and panties because of a guy
It’s called “shopping for lingerie” and it’s one of the many exciting and sexy things that follow a divorce, along with sexting, sleepovers, and orgasms
But, our next lesson is picking up a younger guys at the bar!
Randomize
