I have to decide between the hot young blond with no apparent gag reflex, and the brunette with a great ass and a trust fund.
i was born a porn star she said
Maury Povich's contact info is in our database at work...i should steal it right?
He made me cum so much, I almost let him spend the night. The operative word being "almost".
Exactly how does jacking off in my purse count as a 'early christmas present'?
Today I met the neighbor that shares my bedroom wall. When I pointed out my unit, he said, "Oh, that's you? Oh... that's you." I didn't think much of it until I was in bed tonight and I heard him clear his throat. He's. Heard. Everything.
Nah the bridesmaids all had dates. I slept with the next best thing: girl who WANTED to be a bridesmaid but didnt make the cut.
explain the broken jalepenos in my underwear drawer?
We're both on the slippery slope toward middle age...and really shame riddled bar experiences
Like there's an 87% chance I'll end up on the bedroom floor demanding sex while freestyling in your face. I'm going to buy rum.
Got head last night. Had the 3D glasses on the whole time.
He used the term 'cock-staggering' in an email. So needless to say things are going pretty well.
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
If I'm not there when the plane leaves, I didn't make it through security. See you at home! Vegas bitches!!!
I've got two reasons for you to come over later and one of them is pierced.
Randomize
