Hi, my name's audrey!
Sorry, this girl is phone-stealing drunk.
I just texted him to come over because I want to see if his hand fits the handprint bruise on my ass.....I feel like the cinderella of S&M
Im sorry for drunkenly throwing your phone into the ocean. At the time it seemed like a good way for you not to text him
Tell Taylor to rock on. Tell her she is so beautiful that the sun shines down on her face and shows her beauty. Tell her to live on, like Martin Luther King. He'll never die. He's living his dreams.
Satisfying Perfect Camera Moments
That ACT prep teacher knew i was hung. I could see it in her eyes.
Stop trying to get a gf and raw dog some forest beasts like sasquatch
Noo.... Like in the attic of a crack house with nitrous and fat chicks weird....
Nothing like drunkenly buying a pregnancy test at 8 am to get out and realize your nip was out the whole time.
Woke up with a squirrel in my bed, how was your night?
This Dog Travel Carrier is a Must
He put his burrito in the bag with his dildo.
All boys are excommunicated from my vagina until further notice.
I pretty much just wake up, masturbate at least twice, and go to the beach. #Unemployed. I do look for jobs in between all that tho.
He does impressions. Handy knowing you can get fucked by one guy and pretend a group of celebrities is running a train on you.
He was more upset that I got into his phone than about getting caught cheating.
I don't think Buddha would recommend a sexscpade across Mexico