Do you think my parents will accept my drinking habits more if I told them I like to drink every night because I take good shits the next morning?
i love that you felt the need to clarify that you don't actually have drugs in your vagina.
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
Next time when I try to seductively eat onion rings while drunk remind me of tonight.
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There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
yeah a little bit of me felt bad about it. But the rest of me was having sex with him.
My absolute favorite part of last night was after I puked in the ally, we rounded the corner and you screamed, "she's ok!" and everyone cheered
Not going outside. I may melt into a puddle of wine
... why is there a bottle of pee on my headboard?
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BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
Today is going to be the longest game of "was that a fart, or do I need to go wipe?" I have ever played. Maybe the most challenging too.
I yelled out look at all those hickeys. And then gave her boyfriend a high five
So much rum. So many feels.
My google history for last night included "Whre is johns house" and "wher can i buy nukes?" Pretty sure they're related to one another.
WHY HAVE SO MANY THING GONE IN MY BUTT ON THIS TRIP