i was drunk at family dinner telling about my gay brothers sex ads on criags list
it sounds like her vocal chords are covered in pudding and rocks. come get me.
Have you ever seen a 300 pound pregnant lady's boob fall out of her shirt cuz she's not wearing a bra? I have.
she met some random, took his vcard, peed in his bed, left, and then requested him as her boyfriend on facebook
I don't know what you're doing, but there's a dragon on my street.
Best. Four. Twenty. Ever.
He refused my I'm sry gift of ANAL. That's how angry he was.
I think after that blow job he got the other day he'd set himself on fire if I asked.
Clearly that person doesn't understand how efficient getting drunk and working out at the same time is.
He stole a bottle of grenadine from the bar. And got arrested. His new cell mate is going to love his bright red lips.
Well for starters the people who just made my burger at the grab and go just told me to "hang in there"
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
I can empathize with sociopaths, serial killers, demons, gods, and monsters....straight white males are literally the only barrier to my 100% empathy rate. I don't get it.
I just texted my mom from a strip club.
he told me I was hypnotizing him with my mouth so I guess I do give good head
Randomize
