How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
i dont know what it is, i just found it in my pants.
So for Valentine's Day...I finally swallowed. I feel like I earned that steak.
I'm in the Wal Mart stall where we found out you weren't pregnant. This is where I'm going to propose to you. I feel like that would be the most romantic
At least she'll always have a story about the time she showed up to the emergency room drunk and covered in chocolate syrup on her birthday.
How do I discreetly dispose of sex toy packaging that is recyclable? What to do...what to do?
Stoned, and eating Doritos, and reading about lesbians for class. This is the life.
I just hooked up with the same bartender my dad cheated on my mom with in the 90s. Not sure how this makes me feel.
family traditions my good sir
There is nothing wrong with me introducing you as elephant dick. Nothing.
On the plus side I'm getting really good at painting the inside of a toilet with my bowels.
I made a bong out of my deodorant today. Did you?
I am googling "notable people who had syphilis"
if happy hour never ends, you’ll never have to eat kale
Validation I posted a good pic? The lonely fuckboys send out the booty call signal. Of course I answered the call; Gotham needs its hero.
So, 'head before the store' turned into a fuck fest, & that's how I ended up at the grocery store smelling like a cum farm on Black Friday. How's your weekend?
Randomize
