And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
how many princess gummy vitamins will it take to negate last nights drinking binge?
Is it weird that I found myself thinking of that blue chick from Avatar while she gave me head after the movie?
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
You know you have a great job when you need a DD home from work at 6pm.
I'm going as Jenn Sterger if she answered Favre's calls and ended up in a trash can. If I don't get laid tonight I'm going to be pissed
and he should realize what an amazing ex i am for encouraging my best friend to hook up with him
Dude, didn't you know? Its balls out wednesday.
I started singing the national anthem on a train in London. Happy 4th of July assholes
should I tell them that both of them had sex with me last Saturday? it might be a relationship builder type of thing you know?
DOGS JUST TOTALLY ATE THE FEATHERS OFF MY NIPPLE CLAMPS!!!
Kinda awkward to hear your aunt complain about loose women when you're in town to be a stunt dick for a swingers convention. Just sayin.
I only live four blocks from the bar but when you're hammered this walk feels like the journey through Mordor.
Did we go to Florida? My missing thong and DL just arrived in the mail. Return address was Tampa.
Randomize
