I remember having a drink with vegetables in it. They said it was a mojito, but it tasted like cabbage.
haha i love mojitos
ya and i hate cabbage
I got to see an enormous amount of vagina this morning.
you puked in the cab and all over yourself and tried to convince the cabby it was there already when he got upset... then you puked again. not too convincing are you
turns out a healthy dose of cleavage is the equivalent of a swig of felix felicis
that's why i date skinny girls, they don't realize how small it is.
No, I'm not okay. Girls are wearing BUMPITS here.
this girl is having heart failure because she lost her feather...a gypsy blessed it in turkey. Not sure im high enough for this
He doesn't like you, he likes u not having a gag relfex
I don't remember how we paid for the cab. I do however remember giving him my heels 2 help with the bill.
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
Instead of a hangover my body just feels like shame
That is a hangover
I would prefer a headache
the cops are being surprisingly chill about david hanging from a tree with no pants.
I was 100% done.. I used my vibrator while eating cold pizza. Shit was magical.
I just want to have sex and eat dumplings. Is that so much to ask?
At least you got some excitement going on, you got weed and might die tonight, I'm just sitting here bored as fuck.
Randomize
