Random 1st period thought: do you think she could put "had a threesome" on her resume?
I just opened a bunch of old flavored condoms just to see what they tasted like.
I just met the neighbor hes a self proclaimed coke dealer/ softporn producer.
Also there's a dick sized hole in my tights...should I be worried?
He told me that "my little fuckpig" was a term of endearment in Britain. I think I'm in love.
im suggesting it to him. and by suggesting i mean we're not having sex again unless im wearing high heels
im eating mac and cheese with a makeup brush. there is wayyyyy too much wrong with this night.
You're on Grindr at the STD clinic. I love you.
This is America. Thomas Jefferson would have said I want some vagina.
Also I just had a flash back ... He told me I have nice nipples and then asked me about yours..
Just remember, Dont make worse choices than american flag pants to your own birthday party
I seriously need to grocery shop. I have a slice of cheese, and alcohol.
I can already feel the hangover I'll be having on New Year's Day. I don't know if I'm prepared for this.
Sorry you saw me having sex with your brother on the beach
My co-worker accidentally texted me regarding the threesome him and other one are planning.
Randomize
