After 9 shots a girl with a mustache......still not attractive
The kid in front of me is videochatting and typing to his gf. I should make poop/sex faces over his shoulder, right?
Was finally able to jerk off without the motion giving me a migraine. Think my hangover's getting better.
So I guess I passed out face first on the ground while trying to grill last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude i thought about you literally the second after I came. This friendship is starting to cross some serious boundaries
She puked her nose ring out of her face.
It's a "party harder or raise your standards" kind if night.
i just tried to use a string cheese as a light source
I knew you were super hungover. But so hungover you fire our house cleaner because her vacuums too loud is excessive
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you can't seal the deal with her, I will. And you know I'll be successful. So there's your incentive
Taking care of a girl who just peed on my floor so tonight is not a good night for sex
I just did the math technically I'll be drunk until 2:30-3:00pm
Fuck you and fuck your stupid hat
I just walked across town, stoned off my ass and barefoot in 35 degree weather for him to bust five mins in and then apologize 13 times as I got dressed.
Never again will I go to my mom's side of the family's parties. After the bride and groom cut the head off the roasted pig together they boarded their RV and rode off into the sunset.
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