i wokr up in ohio with no clothes. i think someone gave me ecstacy. can you come find me please it's cold.
Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
seriously i just wanna be friends
pass
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
She kept saying my hands are a cupcake factory
I knew I was high when I wanted to write a poem about how great it felt to wash my face
I know she was blacked out, but she looked directly at the toilet and said "we meet again"
he's paying for my abortion by participating in an alcohol study. dont try to tell me we wouldn't be classy parents
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Clearly the ONLY reason why you were voted employee of the month is because of your upside-down beer funneling skills.
Also can you rate on a scale of zero to jesus restraining order christ how creepy it is that he found a porn star that looks like me and has watched all the porn that she's been in
Part of my treatment is getting high and having sex with 22 year olds. I have a prescription!
I just realized I haven't had a date or a potential possibility of a date in about a year. Then I realized I wanted to actually go on a date. But I'm sitting here getting high instead of being at a party. Life.
And my cousin was so drunk he called an uber and instead he got into a cop car and they took him to the hospital
I'm drunk filing my taxes in a bar on a Monday afternoon in a Regular Show onesie. I think I'm starting to get the hang of this whole adult thing.
Randomize