By the way, she says hi. At least I think she did since she licked my phone
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
I still cannot believe I yelled at every guy at the bar "you wanna get in this clam?!"
i watched you ride a mechanical penis. nothing is awkward between us anymore.
One fish gets drugged and suddenly I'm labeled a bad pet owner. This is so unfair.
She set an alarm on my phone for her birthday. Place: Her bed.
No she stopped screaming. Now she's eating popcorn. Off a plate. With a spoon.
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
He's not letting me leave till I cum. I am a hostage to my own vagina
i keep seeing little orange spots im starting to freak out
you tried mixing adderall in your visine last night..
Great news. I WILL BE FUCKING IN A BOUNCY HOUSE TOMORROW.
Whoever jacked off in MY pong room on the bean bag with your fucking googles pick up your fucking cum towel you gross disgusting fucks. I said NO MORE jacking off in that room. I swear I will empty it out if this is going to continue.
I've finally done it. I finally achieved my lifelong goal of becoming that awkward lesbian in high school who went on to have sex with more women than any of her male classmates.
And then he served me a piece of a brownie on his dick. It tasted amazing. Such a good night!
Was picked up in the middle of a bar full of people...apparently I'm not tall enough to reach for drunken makeouts. I'm proud of myself.
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