Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(703): View more from Virginia

Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick

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(703): Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick http://tfl.nu/1qrd

Replies (32) Good night (3090) Bad night (1016)
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(570): View more from Pennsylvania

i'm telling everyone you had sex with a puerto rican drug lord

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(570): i'm telling everyone you had sex with a puerto rican drug lord http://tfl.nu/ym53

Replies (10) Good night (2983) Bad night (832)
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(512): View more from Texas

Approach what situation? Look, I dunno if you think I'm like some lezbo cheetah waitin in some shrubs to pounce on you the second I see you, but I'm not!

(1-512): View more from Texas

well, everyone in my office is getting a nice laugh right now. But seriously... please delete my number

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(512): Approach what situation? Look, I dunno if you think I'm like some lezbo cheetah waitin in some shrubs to pounce on you the second I see you, but I'm not! (1-512): well, everyone in my office is getting a nice laugh right now. But seriously... please delete my number http://tfl.nu/3fc4

Replies (21) Good night (825) Bad night (3345)
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(618): View more from Illinois

Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake

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(618): Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake http://tfl.nu/xsco

Replies (50) Good night (6052) Bad night (1173)
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(305): View more from Florida

I'll never ask another girl to get on top again, that girl from the bar last night got on top and shit diareah all over my ball sack while she was cumming.

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(305): I'll never ask another girl to get on top again, that girl from the bar last night got on top and shit diareah all over my ball sack while she was cumming. http://tfl.nu/oxhe

Replies (140) Good night (1985) Bad night (38513)
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(917): View more from New York City

the biggest problem in our relationship is that im team edward and my boyfriend is team jacob

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(917): the biggest problem in our relationship is that im team edward and my boyfriend is team jacob http://tfl.nu/1gjp

Replies (193) Good night (2485) Bad night (16148)
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(828): View more from North Carolina

there's something so ridiculous to me about watching someone with glasses exercising. it's like watching a whore studying in the library. stop trying to be someone you're not.

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(828): there's something so ridiculous to me about watching someone with glasses exercising. it's like watching a whore studying in the library. stop trying to be someone you're not. http://tfl.nu/i6ea

Replies (96) Good night (1484) Bad night (4695)
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(972): View more from Texas

The best was having to tell my 16y/o cuz and her bf that we could see him fingering her in the inner tube. Lucky for them, I'm the cool cousin... and was river-level fuckedup.

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(972): The best was having to tell my 16y/o cuz and her bf that we could see him fingering her in the inner tube. Lucky for them, I'm the cool cousin... and was river-level fuckedup. http://tfl.nu/267r

Replies (25) Good night (5477) Bad night (1577)
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(484): View more from Pennsylvania

We have a drunk bartender with her nips a quarter inch from bein out buying us shots. GET HERE.

(610): View more from Pennsylvania

You just said the magic words

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(484): We have a drunk bartender with her nips a quarter inch from bein out buying us shots. GET HERE. (610): You just said the magic words http://tfl.nu/8k47

Replies (24) Good night (5950) Bad night (1205)
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(402): View more from Nebraska

He was sitting on the bathroom floor, swirling his finger in the toilet singing the Laguna Beach theme song. I don't know whether to laugh or help him.

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(402): He was sitting on the bathroom floor, swirling his finger in the toilet singing the Laguna Beach theme song. I don't know whether to laugh or help him. http://tfl.nu/b1lr

Replies (8) Good night (4044) Bad night (1727)
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(405): View more from Oklahoma

I don't know where Tiffany is but I just saw her shoes in the bar lost and found

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(405): I don't know where Tiffany is but I just saw her shoes in the bar lost and found http://tfl.nu/l324

Replies (7) Good night (2962) Bad night (1444)
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(715): View more from Wisconsin

Some might say its sad that I am willingly picking up a coke habit to be the skinniest bridesmaid... I think it shows my great dedication and proves I should have been maid of honor.

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(715): Some might say its sad that I am willingly picking up a coke habit to be the skinniest bridesmaid... I think it shows my great dedication and proves I should have been maid of honor. http://tfl.nu/kri4

Replies (11) Good night (1484) Bad night (2158)
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(513): View more from Ohio

Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.

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(513): Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in. http://tfl.nu/71lv

Replies (2) Good night (1066) Bad night (538)
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(613): View more from Ontario

Yup. Can I borrow your penis decanter for my Xmas party on Saturday

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(613): Yup. Can I borrow your penis decanter for my Xmas party on Saturday http://tfl.nu/1nci

Replies (1) Good night (708) Bad night (397)
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(518): View more from New York

You drunkenly said something along the lines of "move forever" to the lady standing in your way. Needless to say you had too many mimosas at breakfast.

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(518): You drunkenly said something along the lines of "move forever" to the lady standing in your way. Needless to say you had too many mimosas at breakfast. http://tfl.nu/pv3k

Replies (0) Good night (374) Bad night (198)

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