I'm trying to bond with my sister... Its like getting to know a person I never met that I don't like
Please don't use social media to get back at me.
As of this morning, vodka still has the other side of my BFF necklace. She treats me right.
Redeem this text for a blowjob
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Plus you know he's just 2 semesters and 4 glasses of wine away from "experimenting" with some French major
OMGGG I JUST SAW A REAL OWL JUST CHILLING ON TOP OF A SIGN POST. I WALKED UP TO HIM AND SAID HOO HOOOOO AND HE TURNED HIS HEAD AT ME AND WAS LIKE YEAHHH BRO
Some girl took her panties off, soaked them in vodka and wrung them out into a line of guys' mouths! Awesome!
No, NOT awesome. Where the fuck do you go drinking!?!
My dick pics could make it to the popular page on Instagram.
You helped blow my nose... Ok it's safe to say we are on a new level of relationship..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you can't let guys come on your chest and then hog my blanket
Funny you say that, I just sold my stripper pole to my mom tonight...
I shouldn't have to tell you to stop throwing knives at me.
you were so high you just watched the elf.... its spring
i like coming up with different names when i reference that night. 'the night i got kicked out of the bar', 'the night i escaped from the hospital', 'the night we had that threeway'...
He sided with his father, so I slashed his tires. I’d say that’s a fair trade.
Randomize