We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
They are currently going door-to-door asking the neighbors to donate money for Cheez-Its and gift wrap. They asked me to stay back at the house to make another pitcher of margaritas.
Every time you visit for the weekend I end up having to bleach my entire house after.
Remember when you walked in on me sleeping INSIDE a pillowcase?
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There's no way you didn't at least start out with a dick. I obviously know there isn't one now, but there is no way that you were born a girl
I just put on underwear fresh outta the dryer and it's like tiny Angels are giving them warm supportive hugs all over
tried to suck my ex boyfriends dick last night at a bar... Happy homecoming from me to you
I made my uber driver take a pit stop between clubs so we could restock on Xanax. #priorities
U know this is gone far when im in the bathroom trying to take a pic of my asshole
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Double dirt bag award winner tonight. He picked me up in his wife's car.
Woo is fucking right, dude. Vodka night tonight. Honestly, every night pretty much seeems like vodka night lately. My liver wants to move out of my body like I gave it an eviction notice.
and idk now I have nine bags of lettuce in my fridge
Also, you fell asleep with you hand on and around my cock last night.
Yes we can sext. I'm taking my socks off.
last night is slowly putting itself back together. Its one giant slutty puzzle, all the pieces are covered in tequila and shame.
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