god I wish I could record you sometimes, you're so neurotic
can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
I am too pretty for them to be this angry at me.
dude you apologized to her after she called you stupid. you were like "no i'm sorry, you shouldn't have to be around stupid people, it's my fault"
all you kept yelling was "i'm bored and i'm sober"
For future references, orgasms clear sinuses.
I'm cooking a can of baked beans on the baseboard heater. It is too early in the semester to be this poor.
i think i figured out where our problem might have started...when we poured more tequila on top of out margaritas to melt the ice bc they were too cold
hahaha or putting rum in the bbq sauce?
They left at like 4. I got up to help clean their house this morning and we found his pants. No ones heard from him, we're all a little scared.
my mom found me passed out in the kitchen floor with the Brita pitcher.. Happy Mothers Day
Makes sense. My grandma just did this shot. MY FAMILY KICKS ASS.
SO EXCITED ABOUT STRING CHEESE RIGHT NOW
Hey, sorry for threatening to teabag your mom to death last night
Tequila should only be paired with the finest of dick
I am really drunk and also a zombie.
Randomize
