after giving me morning oral, he left saying "hate to eat and run but..." oh yeah, he's getting a second date.
I dont understand how a fully grown man could convince himself that lime green crocks would look good on him.
He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
You should get sea herpes
I mean sea horses
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
shit is crazy. i just keep thinking that this kid growing inside Emily used to live in my balls.
You only like me because I'm a challenge
You already blew me
My tally is now official: I have been drunk every weekend since 2008. Cheers.
We have video of him nailing the sex doll to my wall and putting all the monopoly pieces in her nose
If you hook up with your cousin you will permanently be my favorite person ever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was blowing him while he was singing Happy Birthday to his girlfriend on the phone. I win.
Rush week is fine, only the t-shirts are white and if it rains, the frat boys in their lawn chairs will be treated to 800 freshmen girls in their first wet tshirt contest.
Welcome to college.
IT'S A FUCKING GIANT POKEBALL MAD OUT OF TINY ROSES
why do all the dudes in this porno look like billy ray cyrus
she has no right to get mad at us for drinking during the wedding. she's the one that chose the bridesmaid dresses with pockets.
Last time i cooked this high i tried to makw bacon amd then burned myselfbon the grill, only to realize 25min latwr when the bacon wouldnt cook that the grill wasn't on. I IMAGINED the burn.
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