Apparently I called 911 everytime Sean Kingston told me to
It was not a dingleberry, it was a dinglemelon
how can i incorporate a boy scout uniform into what i do tonight?
He has a chalkboard tally in his bathroom of "Me vs. Toilet". He's losing.
She kept saying "I'm going to hell" the entire time we were fucking. I really wasn't sure what to do... so I agreed with her.
That was definitely the right answer.
Law school is ruining my masturbation schedule.
I guess since this is supposed to be my year of the lesbian it's okay
you're being stingy. if you didnt want people to have sex on your couch, you shouldve specifically said so.
You are the alcoholic guardian angel of raccoons
I know it's not technically the "Mile High Club" but we def need a name for the airport bathroom. Cuz that just happened.
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
I have just found the cubicle of sustenance. And I will rejoice at all the families that have not found this magic. This vodka cubicle of magic.
I still can't get the taste of her nipples and the udon noodles out of my mouth
Is there something wrong with us? Seriously.
Possibly, but I'd rather not fix it.
Why are you barefoot at a strip club?
Randomize
