Farted during a conference call.SBD. permeated the room people were gonna puke.noone could say anything or leave cus we were on the phone with clients. coworkers were outraged.how I still have a job is beyond me.
soooo.. i guess the cop said he'd drop the charges if i go to some AA meetings and i said fuck AA. not one of my better choices.
Its the Friday before break. There are 20 kids in my 300 person lecture hall. All with the same what the fuck am I doing here look on there face.
If people don't want my drunken phone call then TAKE YOUR FUCKING NUMER OFF OF FACEBOOK, like it's just that easy...
come find me. Outside the bar we were just in waving my syringe in the air
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
I'm currently braless eating the balls of the penis cake and drinking warm champagne. I'm 3 cats away from crazy at this point
I'm allowing myself one mistake a year. He gets to be 2012.
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
Every time I walk onto campus my Saint Patrick's day scar starts to throb. I'm like a drunken accident prone Harry Potter
I like how you were offering me $50 last night to come home with you to take care of you and your dog
I'm currently deliberating if I'm going to be too drunk on New Years to handle wearing false eyelashes.
My mom added me on Snapchat which means I am officially done with Snapchat.
I made it 1 week... 5 business days at my new job before sleeping with my coworker.
the guy working the counter at the liquor store noticed i got my haircut and said it was pretty.....
Randomize
