i just google searched "what time does taco bell open"
He told me he could read braille... with his tongue. So I took him home. I don't think he was lying
I could tell by the way he was holding my hand that he really liked you
But I always wanted my obit to read "Died violently in casino orgy," not "Never woke up from rectal surgery."
making your facebook status TEQUILA is like basically saying "im easy tonight. feel free to take advantage"
Just received a visit from the Ghost of Bad Decisions Past. Kind of weird 90% of the flashbacks happened in the same sixteen month span, the rest happened at Taco Bell.
Nope not happening. When I close my eyes the floor moves. I'm going to enjoy this free roller coaster.
my still drunk mind thought "hey this is a really good time to stand in the middle of the street barely clothed in 20 degree weather at 4 am talking about the blow job i gave him soph year of high school"
We were destined to go to rehab together
I'm done being subtle here. MOVE INTO MY EXTRA BEDROOM SO WE CAN FUCK WHENEVER AND NOT HAVE TO WORRY ABOUT FINDING PEOPLE TO HAVE CASUAL SEX WITH.
you live like 200 miles from me and I have two years of school left
goddamnit stop pointing out all the flaws in my plan
Learn from me. Do not smoke cigs and fold laundry in your room. The cigarette will fall into the dresser without you noticing and your shirts will be on fire. Wanna go shopping tomorrow? I need some new shirts.
OMG he dropped his pants for me. Granted it was to show me where he got stabbed but still...
i just want things to go smoothly
oh they won't lmao
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
I guess you could say the date didn’t go so well since I was drunkenly Snapchatting with my ex by the end of it.
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