He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
there is nothing more satisfying than playing sudoku while pooping
Why does it say "go to Planned Parenthood tomorrow" on my dry-erase board?
p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
I feel like Captain Blackout doesn't do her justice. Brigadier General Blackout is much better.
An alarm set every 45 minutes saying "FATTY" and one every afternoon saying "CASPER" every day until spring break is a foolproof plan to being bikini ready
So we are lighting beer bottles on fire and breaking them in half to make glasses
That sounds dangerous
Don't worry......were wearing oven mits.
Just picture a dyson vacuum with razor blades. That's how it felt.
Hello Officers/Paramedics, judging by last night, my friend is dead. The money in his pockets is mine, he owed me. Please send me directions to whichever morgue/strip club for pick up.
Don't get me wrong, the sex itself is amazing, but I don't think I will EVER get used to her habit of singing lines Jesus christ super star when she is about to cum.
u kept repeating to itself "hot cheetos and nacho cheese sauce.."
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
Simple revenge plan: break into his house and steal one shoe of every pair
THAT'S MY GIRL
KICKING BUT AND GETTING PEOPLE INTOXICATED
you've already made the comitment to pee in public you should at least whip your dick out
Randomize
