she looked like the bat from fern gully.
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
the only reason why im excited to go home for break is to finally eat real fucking food and have normal bowel movements.
we hate each other therefore the sex is mindblowing
She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
I have tardy slips. and absent slips if you don't show up to the bar. and trust me, if you are absent there will be a saturday school. I'm teaching you how to drink tonight.
I think I may have appendicitis, but the house is like two blocks from the hospital so I'm just gonna go and drink anyway.
Okay Im going to go have some sex apparently. I hope this chick is prepared the zero effort Im going to put into it.
Did you eat 9 cans of raviolii last night?
Come on man nobody wants to admit that
Bathtub drinking tim. I have no pool so I work with what I have
I told him I'd clean his cock if he ever sent my GF another text message. It was a horrific time for me to miss the l key on my iPhone.
Why am I the only one golf clapping for the vomiting girl on the train who just fell of her seat into her own vomit
I love spring semester, so many high school girls visiting that think I'm the sexiest man alive just because I'm in college
Aren't you gay?
IT'S NICE TO FEEL WANTED DON'T RUIN THIS FOR ME
yeah true but how easily can you rip a scrotum
I swear to god, no guy has been as interested in sticking stuff up my butt as this girl
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