Godddamnit i jsu woke up in oharee. My connecxtion left an hro ago. Thosse flight atttendants can DRinK
FYI, if you pee in my bed (or even let R___ and E___ sleep in it), I will fart loudly during your wedding vows. Trust.
this is something i pride myself on being below average for
If you start sounding at all like you're even remotely in love, expect a lecture on the merits of being a single woman with a vibrator.
This is why we're friends.
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I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
I'm going to make an art book filled with pics of me peeing in every bar bathroom I've ever been in. Dedicating it to you. You're welcome.
New rule: gentleman callers are required to bring me gifts of beer when coming over to court you. Tell the monster jam dudes so they know.
at first i was on the bathroom floor cuz i was hungover. now im just here because it is cool
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
YOU WILL DIE AND I WILL CARVE 'I TOLD YOU SO' ON YOUR HEADSTONE
I wanna say I regret bonging a beer while having sex with Mike, but it helped me get thru it.
After sex he brought chocolates and said he loves RuPaul's Drag Race. How many points does he score for that?
listen. i haven't sucked a dick in well over three years but i believe in myself.
I just took a picture of Austin's dick wearing a hat. Except its not a hat it's a DayQuil cap.
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