When I woke up his cat was sleeping on my face and i had scratch marks on my neck. not happy.
only room for one pussy in that bed.
No now hes going to beat me to our goal of getting someone to have sex in the library. I hate periods.
I don't know what to judge you more for.
He bought me flowers. The card with it said: Sorry I cant get you off. I will try harder.
She told me she was selfish for not giving me a blowjob... I couldn't agree more.
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
I sat on the ground outside wawa chain smoking and telling two strangers about my sex life. I also accepted Rick James Bitch and Celine Dion as their names.
As I was brushing his cum out of my hair he looks at me and says "it happens to me all the time."
I would have gladly let him decapitate me with the way he was biting on my neck.
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
where are you?
talk to ya later, gotta sled down these stairs real quick
Btw if you ever get emails that pretty much contain 'bwahhhhh jatkkvsweuo' it's safe to assume it's me.
Last thing I ever expected to say, "Get your finger out of my ear or I will stop sucking your dick."
I've been vomiting all day.
All day? It's 10am.
I had sex while you were puking this morning and I'm sorry. Kind of.
It's ok. I had sex while you were drunk crying last night. We're even.
Made out with some dude at the bar last night. Was fun until he thought bohemian rhapsody was by The Who
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