i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
you opened the fridge, pissed on the food, fell over, then threw up on yourself. thats whats all over the kitchen.
you wouldn't come out from under your bed because you said there were six-armed bears everywhere.
ohhh that explains the pepperonis I found in my sock drawer this morning...
no it doesn't.
I woke up hugging a loaf of bread and a water bottle this morning
My face left an imprint in the loaf...
After we smoked, the cops questioned us but i just asked if he wanted to join our basketball team.
i was driving around baked, windows down jamming to third eye blind and eating grapes for 35 minutes before i remembered why i left my house
You kept telling me how warm your bag of vomit was and asked me if i wanted to feel.
I wish there was an emoji to express our Eskimo Brothership
I fell off my bed and busted open my chin on the prisoner of azkaban. Somehow missed the almost empty Jose handle next to it. So guess what I was doing last night?
Ummm so I'm at the hospital and just heard some guy get tazed......twice.
I guess that's what I get for clicking on a link that says clown penis.
So that advice that humming stops you from puking? Yeah no, just puked through my nose.
That's a gentle way of saying I passed out like an 18-year-old on his first trip to Tijuana
I complemented his smile, he sends me a dick pic. Seriously?
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