Texts From Last Night

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  (310): View more from California

  she cant drink. allergic to alcohol.

  (1-310): View more from California

  ewwww. she might as well have a dick.

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  (310): she cant drink. allergic to alcohol. (1-310): ewwww. she might as well have a dick. http://tfl.nu/aucq
  Replies (28) Good night (628) Bad night (1352)
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  (479): View more from Arkansas

  Sitting at a red light. Windows are down. I'm blasting Gaga's "Disco Stick" and doing an interpretive dance to it because I think I'm hilarious. Look to the left and see two Phi Delts that I know with their windows down. They are horrified. I am probably going to lose their Facebook friendships.

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  (479): Sitting at a red light. Windows are down. I'm blasting Gaga's "Disco Stick" and doing an interpretive dance to it because I think I'm hilarious. Look to the left and see two Phi Delts that I know with their windows down. They are horrified. I am probably going to lose their Facebook friendships. http://tfl.nu/he2q
  Replies (70) Good night (1795) Bad night (2752)
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  (480): View more from Arizona

  I am currently in the waffle making stage of highness

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  (480): I am currently in the waffle making stage of highness http://tfl.nu/10ex
  Replies (5) Good night (5071) Bad night (820)
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  (248): View more from Michigan

  i woke up in the fire place with a lighter in my hand. if i would have died the night would have made up for it.

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  (248): i woke up in the fire place with a lighter in my hand. if i would have died the night would have made up for it. http://tfl.nu/5a93
  Replies (5) Good night (2389) Bad night (995)
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  (317): View more from Indiana

  Easy Mac is falling out of my sweatshirt as I'm walking down the street.

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  (317): Easy Mac is falling out of my sweatshirt as I'm walking down the street. http://tfl.nu/q42w
  Replies (14) Good night (2602) Bad night (1227)
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  (757): View more from Virginia

  Watched a women out our tannin salon literally fight police because she was getting arrested for trying to drunkenly fight the tanning salon owner...we need to step up our day drinking this is shameful.

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  (757): Watched a women out our tannin salon literally fight police because she was getting arrested for trying to drunkenly fight the tanning salon owner...we need to step up our day drinking this is shameful. http://tfl.nu/da1d
  Replies (5) Good night (1943) Bad night (1706)
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  (919): View more from North Carolina

  my tonsil wound opened up during the kegstand but i stopped it with a popsicle

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  (919): my tonsil wound opened up during the kegstand but i stopped it with a popsicle http://tfl.nu/ki3d
  Replies (3) Good night (949) Bad night (2679)
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  (703): View more from Virginia

  that beer fried lasagna last night was sooo good

  (1-703): View more from Virginia

  that wasnt beer fried lasagna, you just poured beer on my lasagna

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  (703): that beer fried lasagna last night was sooo good (1-703): that wasnt beer fried lasagna, you just poured beer on my lasagna http://tfl.nu/tr0q
  Replies (7) Good night (4262) Bad night (991)
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  (845): View more from New York

  Yeah...I know. It's cute I think...I mean cute in a weird like hey I kinda took you home from the bar one night, maybe criticized your penis, and fucked your brains out...kinda sorta way

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  (845): Yeah...I know. It's cute I think...I mean cute in a weird like hey I kinda took you home from the bar one night, maybe criticized your penis, and fucked your brains out...kinda sorta way http://tfl.nu/6bq1
  Replies (5) Good night (1374) Bad night (609)
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  (416): View more from Toronto

  He's like Medusa, you can't look directly into his eyes or you'll turn into a slut.

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  (416): He's like Medusa, you can't look directly into his eyes or you'll turn into a slut. http://tfl.nu/vwy6
  Replies (8) Good night (5161) Bad night (888)
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  (281): View more from Texas

  To tired for the bar. Came home and drank wine out of the bottle. Kind of don't want to know what that says about my life.

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  (281): To tired for the bar. Came home and drank wine out of the bottle. Kind of don't want to know what that says about my life. http://tfl.nu/6vxl
  Replies (8) Good night (941) Bad night (534)
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  (650): View more from California

  My internship group is made up of all freshman. Their enthusiasm for education and social interaction sickens me.

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  (650): My internship group is made up of all freshman. Their enthusiasm for education and social interaction sickens me. http://tfl.nu/zst4
  Replies (2) Good night (1454) Bad night (548)
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  (425): View more from Washington

  Maybe I'm just didn't notice and imagined a different penis as a Freudian coping mechanism?

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  (425): Maybe I'm just didn't notice and imagined a different penis as a Freudian coping mechanism? http://tfl.nu/s1hj
  Replies (7) Good night (662) Bad night (502)
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  (330): View more from Ohio

  i'm about to be the still-drunkest person on the ellipticals

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  (330): i'm about to be the still-drunkest person on the ellipticals http://tfl.nu/vtga
  Replies (1) Good night (806) Bad night (358)
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  (716): View more from New York

  Sending out old nude selfies with the message "#tbt"

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  (716): Sending out old nude selfies with the message "#tbt" http://tfl.nu/ac88
  Replies (0) Good night (444) Bad night (184)

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