I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
One thing i hate about playoff baseball: George Lopez
closing bar tabs have helped me with simple math in college.
Just did a kegstand with my dad. Happy fathers day.
All I kmoe is rheres a coffee pot full pf vodka in my purse
Ikeep having to ask jim if I'm actually talking. I canmt feel my body...this is what Christmas is all about
Today's been pretty great, I went and bought the new Batman for the sole purpose of masturbating to Bane
I'll feed you vitamin c from my mouth this weekend. Like a baby bird.
Promise??
Let's stay in this weekend and play drinking games to the Winter Olympics.
As long as we can drink anytime we see a stray dog, mafia looking Russian or double toilet.
He stopped in the middle of us banging in order to check in for his Southwest flight.
Oh like it's the first time I've had a bowl of wine
Today is going to be a great day. He just brought me a donut on his dick... It's Sticky Dick Donut Day!!!
The fabulous human disaster: it is him
No reason. My tongue went numb after one shot. I may die tonight
Randomize
