It wouldn't matter if you are Jesus Christ himself, you are not getting into the bar tonight
so i completely puked my brains out. a lot. he held me up so i could brush my teeth. then we proceeded to hook up for the next four hours.
he's a keeper
I just googled maps his house, and took the virtual tour back to my apartment, just so I could visualize the walk of shame in the morning
It wasn't a wasted relationship. I got road-head in an Escalade. I still keep that with me.
Through drunken recall, I have managed to bring back awful memories of losing my virginity. And possibly traumatized my niece trying to get her to "learn from my mistakes".
his apartment was in a funeral home, walk of shamed through a visiation in the skankiest outfit i own
We should hook up after this. Laugh or look horrified to say yes.
The cat be actin like a 2:30 am poop is the time to tell me all about her thoughts and fears in life. No bitch, this is definitely alone time.
The cop said he like my hair today. Please explain all other interactions with law enforcement, k thanks
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
She's Jesus crazy. And one if not more other forms of crazy. She's 2.5+ crazy.
All I wanted was a couple of orgasms before work, is that too much to ask?!
I cannot pick him out of a line up. I remember he is blonde and his half flaccid dick looks like gonzo. So unless he pulls down his pants I don't know who he is
My vagina cried when he left. I think she's about to be at war with my self respect.
i feel like the girl with kaleidoscope eyes except the kaleidoscopes are sparkly butt plugs
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