i told him i was gay. he said that gay guys are supposed to be pretty.
Lady next to me is getting american flags airburshed on her nails. god bless the ghetto.
So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
Don't be a smartass. I'm trying to fuck a guy who's sober. It's more difficult than you think.
at which point I apparently ran in and shouted "I made the sex with that one!"
When else am I ever going to have a chance to do lines with T-Pain?
They're tearing apart the house I lost my virginity in:(
I need vodka and champagne for my new favorite drink, vodkapagne. Alternative spellings are "vodkapain" and "vom-machine"
Like I would feel weird too if you just cancelled our wedding, cut off all your hair and started twerking everywhere
I was thrusting to the beat of Felix Navidad..
Do it!! We better have a duck by the time I get home.
I'm not saying I'm planning to hook up tomorrow but I'm also not saying I'm unprepared for it
i'm not sure you can trust me in a car with 20 dozen donuts
then he said the sex was mediocre and that it was because of me. and that we could try again tomorrow.
it was 100% mediocre because of him, and we will 100% not be trying again tomorrow.
Randomize
