I'm really into asian looking animals
Spotted on freeway- girl in ford focus takes a hit from a 7 inch pipe while knee driving. She winked at me. I want her life.
when i told him i was pregnant with his baby he texted me 'congradulations'
i pity the fetus.
Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
This hot topless Jamaican just ran down the st with me on his back and He was screaming "I be stealing yo white ladies."
I don't know if i should be jealous or worried... or question where you are.
At second job interview this week. Wearing pants to hide pole dancing bruises. This my life.
I also just told a guy I was available for counseling in case he needed to 'bang' things out. I've become a monster.
He looked like he was trying to woo a lady version of himself by playing goblin music on his guitar.
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
Dude. Where are you? I'm making waffles in the waffle iron. It's beautiful.
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
I just loudly threatened to kill a self checkout machine
Great litmus test for what a useless adult you are: amount of shame you feel while eating a coffee cup of Fruity Pebbles
At one point of the night i was standing at the bar and 3 of them had their hands down my pants, they were like thumb wrestling for it.
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