I kind of feel like guidos are mythical creatures.
if we dont hook up this weekend, im doing both his roommates
I feel like a really awesome person when i have to check my roof for things i've lost
He said he wanted to see my room, not my womb. It's a common mistake.
No driving. The car is spinning. I am praying for mcdonalds.
I haven't found him passed out in the living room covered in noodles for a while now so I guess he's getting better with the drinking.
There are rocks in my bed. And dirt all over my face. Explain?
Last night you sang a duet with a gay man posing as a straight man posing as nicole kidman; your life lacks neither color nor texture:)
I have what looks like a rubber stamp mark on my cock from last night that says "Magic Marla Approved" Do we know a Marla?
I told her my blood type was O Positive and we started making out. Bio majors are weird.
I lost a fight last night. By that I mean I head butt the bar and busted my lip open.
My niece I'm babysitting left earlier to stay the night with her friend. I got ditched by an 8 year old.
I'm not sure if 14 year old me would be disappointed or proud that I fucked him behind her middle school??
Turns out the guy I did all that coke with the other night is a cop
We're dating now
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
Randomize
