two more shots til everyone in this club gets to see my cesarean scars.
I realized today that I should stop thinking so much with my vagina instead of my brain.
Please tell me this doesn't mean another "surprise road trip" where I spend all my money on gas and the SURPRISE destination is the abortion clinic.
But what if I pay for the gas?
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
Man, jail baloney is awful.
i talked to you about this last night, and you kept saying "he wants yo pusssaayyyyyy"
I had a dream that our used condom started talking to me. I told me that I did an amazing job, and told me that it saved me. From aids.
The fire breather is here so I may get my second wind.
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
At some point you realize they're vacuuming and you still have to sober up. Please find me a boyfriend thanks .
I misjudged the power of my pelvic thrusting capabilities. His nose is broken. Thoughts?
She's cute, but batshit. Like some kind of dominatrix disney princess.
If waking up at 6 50 pm every day and getting invited to go have sex as you wake up is what alcoholism is like I can get use to this.
Your choices in alcohol this weekend are thoroughly disappointing
My liver is screaming fuck you right now.
we went to the skate park then back to her house for dinner, and somehow that ended with her making me blueberry pancakes at 2am
Randomize
