Being hungover naked and coloring my hair. I guess I am not naked I have black latex gloves on. Give me a call.
im coming over.
Why would you say my penis is small in front of so many people?
He had a beer bottle in each of his back pockets and was on rollerblades. All I remember is following him for about 10 minutes
I spiked my fruit smoothie. Taking bikini season diet to a whole new level
Had no idea what his name was when I woke up. Went through his desk, found his tax records. Ben. And loaded.
Just put an ad on Craigslist for a fake groom... I'm sure only non creepy sane people will respond to it
I just accidentally hit share on pornhub... Probably the scariest moment of my life
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
he's singing something in russian and knocking over my plants with his dick, get his drunk ass out of my apartment
HE STUCK IT IN THE FISHBOWL WTF
Deciding whether to take my sex toys home for Christmas will be the biggest decision I make this holiday season
You were laying in a hotel bed drinking beer from a straw while you demanded everyone to kiss your foot tattoo.
Was it you I was with where I saw a guy open a beer with his butt?
this potential sugar daddy just sent me a photo of him butt naked in the woods saying he wants to "grow our spirits together." so i think i found us a new drug dealer!
Not this time. I'm drinking in my sweatpants which means I've given up for the day and shouldn't be in public.
She won't let me meet her hot new boy toy just because she thinks it'll lead to us having a threesome. It's not fair. I thought we were friends...
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