Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(206): View more from Washington

Ooooh. That's not a mole. Uncomfortable.

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(646): View more from New York

party started at 10. cops are coming to shut us down now and its 11. i already lostmy underwear and im wearing a sparkly thong on my haed. this has to be some kinda record.

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(253): View more from Washington

My mind says no, but my body says yes.

(703): View more from Virginia

What does your body say about chlamydia?

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(512): View more from Texas

its amazing how hard it is to tell vomit from stuffing the day after

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(727): View more from Florida

You blinded her by spitting vodka in her eyes, the vodka you had just taken as a body shot off of her.

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(978): View more from Massachusetts

It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great

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(734): View more from Michigan

I will give you 100$, a blow job a day for a month and I will shave my legs according to societal standards until next November if you come recuse me from my night class right NOW.

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(973): View more from New Jersey

if you guys find pieces of my teeth don't throw them out please

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(845): View more from New York

i just used your hair clip to unclog my bong. i miss you so much!

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