...seriously? chocolate pudding? motorboating? No one has even done that to ME and i am 69 times the whore you are
Dude, 1 prime defect in the snuggie- you can't fuck someone discreetly under a snuggie. No way no how
Life is so much better after having sex.
We could make it a date. Dinner and a show. The show being my nipples getting pierced.
I think off duty cops drove me home. I may have been hitchhiking
I think I pulled my groin stumbling back from the bar. That or the hippo I woke up next to.
Is a wave an appropriate goodbye when your one night stand wakes up and walks out towards the door while you are looking through the garbage for the evidence of a condom?
He ate me out like a beaver on a tree. I've never been so scared in my life
The problem is drunk me is completely unaware how poor I am
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
it's taken me 3 hours to eat this pudding cup. I think I am melting.
As long as you don't want to make a shrine out of my eyelashes It's all good
Woke up in the ER with a nurse holding my tongue together inside of my mouth and a shattered jaw, the last thing I remember is opening the 151, care to fill me in?
It's a lube slip n slide down the hallway now. Details later.
She had a toddler. It threw up and then some guy said party foul and put it on the porch. Going back next Friday.
Randomize
