Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
i just google searched "what time does taco bell open"
How do u explain cocaine to a 9 year old?
You know its bad when convincing your mother you were masturbating is the better alternative
Thought I woke up to a girl giving me a handy. It was a male nurse inserting a catheter.
Am I the only one that feels like there are hundreds of tiny people having a rave and stomping and kicking around inside my head this morning?
You told me you aren't worried about the police that you've been training for this an that the last three months of your life have been devoted to building up your stun gun tolerance and pepper spray recovery time.
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
Saved a life and got us a free vacuum cleaner (and learned vacuum is not spelled "vacumn"). Get on my level.
Whatever, I used my iphone to send an Escalade to pick up a booty call last week. For free. It is futuristic as fuck out here.
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
There are five fire trucks here and needless to say my booty call left so come back home whenever you like
She has a bong hits for Jesus shirt. Of course I'm going to like her.
I'm at the back whiskey bar with a 7 and 7 in a winnie the pooh costume. Come find me.
Randomize
