I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
You picked the wrong day to call in sick. She's wearing the librarian glasses today.
Did you know nanny-cams work just as well for recording that blow job on the sofa?
my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
Made out with me girlfriend while she was peeing. all time high, or all time low?
I managed to throw up 90 feet under water, just removed my breathing tube, puked, put it back in. All inclusive is the way to go.
i was about to rearrange the room but realized that this is the only efficient setup where we can have sex while the other one's asleep without them accidentally seeing.
I'm drinking screwdrivers in the pool naked. Call 911 if I don't check in regularly
there's fuck elsewhere to go, I'll be there with 8 lbs of bronzer on my tits
I woke him up with a blow job and he started sing "oh the USAAAA. IT'S GOING TO BE S BEAUTIFUL DAYYYYY"
You need to come back and help me drink our beer so the fridge has room for the other beers
Last night was great... In the "I got videotaped making out and getting a handjob on the couch in front of 100 people." kinda way.
A cop may or may not have seen my bare ass against the moonlight within the past hour
I had sex while watching Lord of the Rings last night. I think I just reached a new level of nerd.
Then it hit me - his penis wasn't a shiny new toy anymore and I wanted a new one.
Randomize
