Do u think she knows her nickname is the oompa loompa
You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
he's washing the lighter in the sink and telling me to picture unicorns. requesting backup.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you were trying to convince me that you weren't drunk by grabbing my shoulders, looking deeply into my eyes and saying "i can see your sparkle"
How external is "for external use only"?
At least I will not still be rolling when I pick up this animal. Thats a good development in five years
He told me we were going to a cabin. It's just logs and a tarp made into walls. This night can go either way at this point.
I think I just smoked a piece of your foot. Were u picking your feet by the weed?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Pre-chapter meeting quote: "Why is there a bun literally taped to the shelf? That doesn't even make sense when you're drunk, who does that?"
He said he'd prefer a photo rather than discuss politics, I sent him a snapchat "conservative shorts 4 conservative man". He said "be liberal"
Text me later if you aren't dead and wanna have a drink later
He has no idea I'm scrolling through Instagram while he's going down on me. I'm so bored.
So I slept with some guy last night and when I woke up in the am couldnt remember his name. I text him n asked "How do you spell your name?" to try n find out and all he replied was "With an A." WTF!?
I will consider today a failure if my nipple isn't bitten at least 😂
Oh is THAT how we're gonna play mini golf
Randomize