she's about as cool as a sandpaper handjob.
Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
guy at the corner shop gets out a bottle of tequilla and a pack of malboro light whenever he sees me through the door. makes me feel loved and cared for
He tricked me...the first song on his sex mix was trey songz but the rest were techno....i can't walk straight now
I turn the corner to find her walking in the front door in a tee-shirt, two different shoes and no pants. All she said to me was "I'm sad"
Dude just slipped a $20 into the jukebox at that restaurant we were escorted out of last Mardi GRAS. Hope they enjoy Justin Bieber's Baby cause they're gonna hear it 40 fucking times.
Am I the only one that feels like there are hundreds of tiny people having a rave and stomping and kicking around inside my head this morning?
Seriously though a big penis is like a puppy dog, or a sunny day or some other glorious thing
You are such a penis elitist
You went in the back with her.. And honestly I couldn't tell her neck from her tits man..
I don't remember coming in last night, but apparently I ate a piece of pizza because when I woke up I had pizza crust stuck to the back of my thighs.
We were in bed, and he looked at me and asked if I'd be weirded out if he took his leg off. BEST.SEX.EVER.
Why can I remember how tall Nicki Minaj is from looking up her height once months ago, yet after weeks into the semester I can't even remember where any my classrooms are located
Importance
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
Hangover and judgement, the breakfast of champions.
Just saw a girl I banged wearing a pro life shirt downtown. Not sure where to start with that.
Randomize
