a kid in a transformers shirt tried to pick me up last night at work. he also rolled up on a bicycle, the kind with pedals. do i look that easy?
bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
Well.. considering he unknowingly dated a prostitute, I consider myself the winner in that break up.
it was good sex until i became a rubber doll and he became a jack hammer, so i guess overall it was good
Obviously a higher power wants us to be sunday drunk together
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
He's acting like I should like him more than vodka and Taco Bell, but I just don't ser that happening.
First thing on my "to do" list- get sober for community service.
Why the fuck is he under my phone as Papi Chulo?
My whole sorority girl exterior is just a lie. I'm a fat tumblr girl on the inside.
A place where it's acceptable to show body parts is not a good place for me to be.
The shrooms have turned on carrie. Change of plans. We're getting stoned and finding bacon.
At least your road beer policy is responsible. Well, relatively speaking.
You need to be on (or possibly create) the international emoji committee to address all of these glaring oversights
I have photo proof.
Girl, don't care. What's my rule? If I don't remember it, it never happened.
Randomize
