And I just remember seeing him for the first time and being like, who is this ape of a man? Like legit he could be the missing link
they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
you're acting like its my fault you're allergic to sperm or something.
i told you we never speak of that again
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
I feel like I'm laying on a pillow cloud. With little baby angel fingers between me and the cloud lifting me up. Singing hymns in my ear.
i am an animal i am literally locking myself in my house and not coming out for a week i don't deserve to be in public
If there was a tv show called "True Life: My 58 Year Old Dad Rolls Better J's Than Me" I'd be on it.
I folded my dollar bills into mustaches in preparation for our trip to the strip club
No just a slight sexual miscommunication which led to a little (lot) vomiting by one party and a bruised sternum on the other party involved.
I can't even make a guess how that goes.
I just meant the frequency of your blow jobs on a flow chart wouldn't look too promising
Please come over here so I can show off my beard, talk to you about how quantum computing is actually a symptom of interstellar physics, and then put my head under your dress
As much as I want you to bang someone other than me, he is an asshole.
Randomize
