I need help removing her.
just to let you know, don't open your linen closet for a while until i come over with a cleaning kit and geek squad
thats the only time ive ever had sloppy firsts
I dont wanna date her. I just wanna be able to run a blacklight over her face and prove ownership.
The cardboard box in my backseat wasn't strong enough to keep your pee contained. Come clean my car.
it's not like i was drunk to the point of NEEDING help...i just wanted someone to offer to hold my hair or something.
I wasn't sure how he was going to followup "so,i shot myself.." i guess "w a nail gun" is the best choice out of what I expected
I'm going to have to start playing roller derby again so I can blame my sex-related bruises on that.
If he shows up in a "mount n dew" me shirt im throwing him to the lesbians
My fake id got more birthday sex than I've had in my life.
My heart stopped for a sec, but I snorted what I believe was cocaine off the floor, and I'm back in the fight
It was like being run over by an orgasm freight train.
I think he's like Cher he's going to live forever but not as scary looking
Most people would agree that it IS in fact slutty to give someone head for free ice cream.
She looked up and said "I like this." I asked "what do you like?" she said "penis."
Randomize
