I hope mine doesn't look like that
Waaait I'm alsleep in myt car somewhere
As per my father's affair, married men are no longer off limits.
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
Can you fuck me on the kitchen counter at some point? I'll lysol it after
Sadness tears and throw up everywhere
Think about if the incredible hulk and king kong had a retarded baby. That's the sound she made in my ear the entire time I fucked her.
you started petting my head and said "there there, majestical unicorn. it won't be long before we get you back to neverland."
Actually, I take that back. You can only have it if I'm allowed to French braid the mullet.
Just had to kick my 26 yr old boyfriend out of my bed before getting the kids up for school. Have I mentioned being 41 doesn't suck as much as all the hype.
I did get to watch you pee, tho. That counts as another precious moment.
he bit THROUGH my nipple
plus side, no need to pay for a piercing.
Yeah! Just remind me to. I'll also bring the blow up penis
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
I thought it turned out lovely. You got to see me almost naked and I got to be stoned to the point I was content with
Wtf when were you almost naked??
Randomize
