we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
k, so I just picked a four leaf clover, then saw my dads penis. Lucky? I think not.
It's like sleeping with someone you met at a karaoke bar. It's never okay.
I think I found my soulmate. This guy in front of me is yelling about getting laid while holding two beers and texting. I think this is love.
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just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
You kept running into the wall most of the night. When people asked you what you were doing you told them you were the kool-aid man and there was little kids on the other side of the wall who needed your juice
Sometimes i wish my penis was detachable that way i could take it off sometimes so i wouldnt get into these situations
I ended up with a bullet proof vest and I still don't know his last name.
Singing high school musical songs with an old Russian woman I met on the bus. What are you doing?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have vodka and explosives. For once, we can blow something up that isn't a blow-up doll.
VIVE LA RESISTANCE
Oh god, what now?
Just found a rebirth in peppermint schnapps. May be able to stay up all night and finish this paper after all. MERRY CHRISTMAS
My chance to home wreck was right in front of me and I didn’t grab it by the balls
In the last 3 weeks my drunken adventures have caused me to lose 2 credit cards, one debit card, a bracelet, two purses, and my $500 phone... Maybe i should quit drinking.
College is really paying off. I am gonna be a great teacher. I just made a grading sheet for weed. This shit got an A.
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