He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
but she was nice to me.
She was a fuckin STRIPPER.
this is no time to have dignity 4/20 is coming
I just introduced him to multiple male orgasms. I love wine AND tequila
i distinctly remember leaping through the apartment to rescue the clam chowder burning in the kitchen
I may or may not have shit out a layer of my liver after that weekend.
YOU CAN'T BASE A RELATIONSHIP OFF A PENIS
I LIKE HIS TONGUE TOO.
She tied her key to her bra the night before and couldn't get it off while trying to open the door this morning so she just took her bra off and let it tangle from the key while unlocking the door...the old Indian couple next door were shocked.
I am the prescription. I can be taken orally or vaginally and in any dosage. This is why I went to med school.
My goal is to not catch on fire... But if i have to dance im going to dance regardless of the danger
i decided if i had to, i could survive with only 3 fingers on each hand.
SERIOUSLY WHY DOES EVERYONE INSIST THAT THEY NEED TO SEE MY BOOBS
Because there's a shortage of perfect breasts in this world. You should start charging for viewings.
I HAVE 5 FELTING NEEDLES AND THEYRE GOING DIRECTLY INTO YOUR EYES IF YOU POST THAT SHIT
I just wish he would stop trying to bring his emotional baggage into our sexual relationship.
After we won that round of beer pong you attempted to swallow the winning ball whole claiming you had the mouth and jaw of a snake.
A snake? I must've been gone...
After that you got naked and hissed at people the rest of the night..
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