If you're going to watch porn, can you atleast be considerate and watch it on my old laptop and not the new one?
Everytime I think about NYE, my gag reflex kicks in.
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
judging by the pasta sauce and dirty pans i spent my blackout being emeril
We're all getting matching jack daniels tattoos. We're gonna be an alcoholic gang of awesome.
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
Yes, he did use his cock to direct traffic from my 3rd story window. That's why I love him
Her family was right next to mine during christmas eve mass. Between the terrifying glares and her trying to set my sleeve on fire during the candle part I am VERY sure she knows im fucking her ex...
I'm in your room because it's a safe space. Is it ok to pee in here?
I heard the bride mutter "I should have brought a fucking tranquilizer". I'm not at all surprised that you got banned from the bar afterwards.
I woke up while eating peanut butter from a jar. I don't think I should be social today.
His premature ejaculation problem is getting old.
The highlight of the trip was definitely my dad telling me that I "used to be his prettiest daughter."
Nah, just stick him in a closet with some cheetos, a blunt and soda. The darkness will calm him down until Mallory can be located.
She said to call her, so I called her. Her boyfriend answered and traced the fucking call. I could litterally hear him yell because it turns out he lives in 4d
Don't you live in 4c?
Randomize
