I just tried to pick my 105-lb puppy up and accidentally fingered its asshole
There are some things we keep to ourselves Brian
I'm taking last night back. It officially didn't happen. Tell your friends.
You're just mad at the fact that I want to be a car alarm.
Theres also beggin' strips and a dog bone in the corner...nooo signs of there being a dog though.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Soooo how am i supposed to explain to my mom that i was admitted to the hospital but you kidnapped me within 20 minutes?
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
Well his ex just grabbed his dick and told him yep Ill call u later
Seriously, this trumpet player gives me chills. Might be the drugs.
There is a 90 percent chance I threw up in a mailbox last night....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
God this is like a meg Ryan movie without the restaurant orgasms
I stopped his blowjob to raise 3 fingers & whistle the hunger games tune to the people walking past the window
Happy hour crawl turned into power happy hour turned into tequila shots turned into I'm drunk in class on Cinco de Mayo at 7 am.
The guy I blew who bought us all the shots last night? I really think he's the TV guy I'm watching give the local weather. Like right now.
Also, you fell asleep with you hand on and around my cock last night.
there's no judgement here...i was recently just fingered in my dorm hallway while having a conversation with 5 people.
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