It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
My wife caught me jerking off, I had to tell her I was thinking bout her
angela screamed across the room SHES A CHAMP when i told the pharmacist plan b doesnt make me throw up
Can we comment on the fact that at five thirty this morning, security woke me up in the hotel lobby, in my underwear, and some random guys winter coat?
yeah he was eating me out and i didnt know someone made popcorn so I thought the smell was comming from my vagina
wtf
I don't remember his name but he sat in the bathroom and gave us both advice...
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
It says a lot about how well I know you when I can understand messages of yours that say things like "sauteed Jesus."
You just kept screaming at everyone 'not to break your scarf' and doing somersaults
I mean you were pretty drunk at one point you asked if we could have a glass of water ready for you in case you choked while bobbing for apples, but you said grape juice was preferable. You can't choke on an apple btw
Just had the "whores are people too" talk with Mom. Bright side it's Christmas, and I may have been drunk, I don't think she caught on.
I had a spiritual reading tonight and my dead grandmother called me a whore.
Do you want me to add this to the list of actions I will state at your intervention
I stole the butter cup cuz i brought home my rolls and chicken and didnt want the butter everywhere. I miss your body because its amazing.
Randomize
